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13 September 2002 (Friday): maman

I would like to reiterate that my mom is the coolest Mom on the planet. (That's a non-competitive superlative there. I'm sure there are a lot of people whose moms are the coolest on the planet.)

When I become a mother I want to be just like her.

I probably won't, though. I am an exact half-and-half mix of my parents. This means I am more ambitious than my mother, more adventurous, more fascinated with intellectual pursuits; also less empathic, less happy-go-lucky, more prone to moodiness and depression.

I am also a lot more American and a lot less Asian than either parent. It remains to be seen what the exact implications of this will be, and I've wondered countless times just how Asian I'm supposed to be. "Your only real claim to a culture is the one you inhabit," I suggested last night, as Mom and I nibbled on leftover slices of her birthday cake. "I grew up here; I learned the language and customs of this place. I learned a little about the language and customs of the place you came from, too, but that's second-hand. It's not really mine."

She nodded thoughtfully. "Well, it's history," she said. "It's not the present. And anyway, if you're going to 'pass down' a culture, what is it really that you're passing down? Basically a snapshot. When I came here and met the people who lived in Chinatown, they seemed strange to me -- their way of talking was different, the way they celebrated holidays was different. But then I realized that they'd kept what they'd known of Taiwan when they left. The homeland kept evolving after they were gone." She shrugged. "But I still think it's important to have a sense of history. You know, to hear Grandma's story, my story, Dad's story. Just to know the bigger thing you're a part of."

posted by enjelani @ 02:38 PM PST

Replies: 2 comments

You ever feel like you really *want* to comment on somebody's blog, but have ABSOLUTELY no idea what to say??

That's me right now. I'm um, still alive, but doing a horseshit job with the comments of late. Anyhew, just know that i'm still around reading and still around caring :)

And if you could, give Soren a big ole hug for me.

posted by syndromes @ 18 09 2002 11:27 PM PST

same here. :)

And, actually, I wanted to add that, as much as your parents shaped you as part of their environment, their parents shaped them and on backwards... That, in and of itself makes their culture a building block for yours...no?

posted by Moonpuddle @ 19 09 2002 08:50 AM PST