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26 October 2002 (Saturday): huh?

I was told today, more or less, that it's a pity I was never taught how to choose my friends.

I'm not quite sure where to begin with this one.

Under other circumstances I would shrug it off, but it so happens that it's not quite that simple. Presently I'm just wondering whether it's possible to blink angrily.

posted by enjelani @ 11:08 PM PST

Replies: 4 comments

I'm astonished to hear that someone put it that way. It doesn't just verge on being rude - it's at least a couple miles past the border checkpoint on Insulting Territory.

I mean, it's a valid point - it's a lesson I hadn't learned myself until I was about 22 or 23... but if that's really how that person said it, it's also a slap in the face to all of us who call you a friend, unless it was qualified with reference to one or more particular bad eggs. It doesn't sound like it was, though.

Without having anything else to go on, I'd still have to say that it sounded uncivil enough to inpugn that person's own judgment, before it could even begin to suggest anything about your own.

equally perplexed,

m. mellow

posted by m. mellow @ 26 10 2002 11:39 PM PST

Bowling for Columbine
taught me not to pull out the AK
pump that swine
full of bullets to here and there, but hey
you're not me, and I'm not you
so slap that punk
till he's blue
and says his words are junk.

posted by Adam @ 28 10 2002 05:07 PM PST

and how exactly would one go about teaching another how to choose friends? i'm as bewildered as you.

more often than not, friendships can't be understood by those outside the relationship, particularly those who choose to make snap judgments and find smug satisfaction in that. relationships also shouldn't be reduced to a grid of logical attributes that suddenly add up to a "correct friend." it doesn't work that way, and it denies the intangible magic that makes the friendship a special thing.

it's up to each of us to have faith in our own instincts to tell us such things. you've chosen your friends for your own reasons. believe in that.

oh yeah, and *hug* :)

posted by soren @ 29 10 2002 12:13 PM PST

I'm a bit of a smart-ass; I would have replied: "Perhaps you should reconsider your stance; after all, I chose you." *evil-grin*

It's completely fair to tell someone that you don't dig a selection of their friends and maybe even why. But to make a character judgment on you like that is not fair. Blink away...

posted by Bill @ 29 10 2002 01:42 PM PST